American slang can get downright confusing. A slang phrase might completely contradict its dictionary definition, and for those who don't understand the phrase, the person may appear to be spouting nonsense. While most of the time these people actually are spouting nonsense, the phrases they use have definite meanings. Today we explore the true meaning of 12 slang phrases that need to die out, and reasons why we believe that they should be extinct at this point:

I'm Bugging Out

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This phrase is generally used by stoners to let their friends know that their high just started freaking them out. Taken literally, the phrase means "I am turning into an insect," and unless you're Gregor Samsa, this is surely not the case. "Bugging out" is the terrifying feeling that strikes when that extra mushroom you ate or gram of marijuana you smoked hits you just as your parents come home early from their vacation to find you in your pajamas listening to Phish and dancing around your living room. Your parents have a different term for this, its called "disappointment."

Blowing Up (My Phone)

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Though it might sound like a terrorist code for a roadside explosive, "blowing up" someone's phone has nothing to do with explosives. Used mostly by 14-24 year old girls, the phrase actually means that you're calling someone's cell phone over and over again. Luckily, science has developed the cell phone to receive as many calls as possible. In fact, no amount of incoming calls will cause your phone to explode. Next time someone is "blowing up" your phone, just pick up and ask them to stop calling so much.

That's What's Up

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What started as a particularly urban phrase, "that's what's up" has spread to the suburbs and is now commonly heard by people from every conceivable social circle. "That's what's up" is commonly used to express that some particular situation is great and exciting, ie - "Sally said she wants a threesome with me and Jane? That's what's up!" Confusingly enough, the phrase literally means that something is above the speaker. Now, if you're having the threesome on the roof, that's really "whats up."

That's Wicked Awesome

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"Wicked awesome" is generally used by kids to describe something that is so pleasing that traditional compliments just won't do. What these people don't realize however, is that the phrase "wicked awesome" is an inherent contradiction. Since wicked means bad, and awesome means very good, what these people are actually saying is, when they say "Paul's car is wicked awesome", is that "Paul's new car is good in a terrible kind of way." Phrases like these make me feel bad for English language learners.

That's Key

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Key: a metal device shaped in such a way that when it is inserted into the appropriate lock the lock's mechanism can be rotated.

This senseless phrase is commonly uttered by east-coast hipsters to signify that something is pretty cool. Its not cool enough to be "wicked awesome," but it is pleasing to the senses no less. As an example, a new Modest Mouse album might be considered "key" to these people. What lock do shitty music and "ironic" clothing open you ask? Perhaps a door to eternal virginity? This is a question for the ages.

That's Tight

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Despite tight meaning containing and constricting (both generally bad things), "tight" has long been slang for something fun and enjoyable. Something as simple as "yo, the limo we rented for prom is tight," can invoke fear in an overweight person with claustrophobia who's never heard the phrase before. But something need not be small and constricting to be "tight." In fact, something as roomy as a million dollar mansion can be called "tight" by some people. Note: it is appropriate to use "that's tight" in slang is when when you're talking about your favorite bar's glory hole.

You Got Owned/Pwned

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Own: the state or fact of exclusive rights and control over property, which may be an object, land/real estate or intellectual property.

To get "owned" is a slang word that started in the Internet gaming community as way of saying "I beat you really badly in this game that I spend 12 hours a day playing." Recently, however, the phrase has crawled it's way out of cyberspace and has begun cropping up in casual conversation as a way to tell people they lost some competition in one way or another. Hackers and gamers are equally to blame for the spread of this annoying phrase which is so far- reaching in its popularity that sports commentators have been known to utter it in times of excitement. But seriously guys, just listen to yourself say, "You got pwned!" out loud, in a room by yourself -- it should be enough to make you never say it in public again.

That's Balling/Ballin'

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Isn't "balling" someone what you do to a person who's asleep with their mouth open. No, that's tea-bagging. But, people that still use this term in 2010 ( we have decided) deserve to have their tongues slapped with a hairy beanbag. Generally, a person who is balling (pronounced - ballin') is living an ostentatiously wealthy lifestyle, spending money like it isn't an problem, and taking his friends along for the party. These are the people you want to be friends with. Most of the people that use this colloquialism, however, tend to look more like the guy in the above photo. Their friendship is questionable.

Let's Get It Popping

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Just last week I was told to come to a house party and "get it popping." Because I don't normally watch hip-hop music videos, I was a bit tentative about what to expect. As it turns out, to 'get it popping' means consuming tons of liquor, listening to loud music and watching well-dressed people getting down with their bad selves. The point I'm trying to make here, is why didn't my friend just tell me, "hey, you should come over and we'll get drunk. Then we'll try to convince 21-year old girls to fall on our penises." Or, is it "penii?"

That's Out of Pocket

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When someone is behaving completely ridiculous, they are sometimes said to be acting "out of pocket." As an example, if you're at the club and your friend comes in wearing a pastel leisure suit and hollering at every girl in sight, some might say he's acting "out of pocket." Taken literally, this phrase means that someone or something is literally outside of your pants pocket. Unless you're talking to your girl's hand, it doesn't make sense to scorn someone for being "out of pocket."

That's Hot Shit

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One can scarcely conceive of how something as repugnant, hated, and brown as "shit" came to mean something good. "Hot shit," for that matter, is literally one of the most revolting substances one can encounter, yet people often refer to enjoyable objects, food, people and situations as "hot shit." Taken literally, telling your date "This quesadilla is hot shit," is telling them that they are stuffing their face with warm excrement. Let's grow up you guys, we just sound stupid if we say this.

Cougar

as in "I'm Trying To Rope Me a Cougar"

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To rope a cougar is to meet a significantly older woman (usually in her 40s) at a bar and bring her home to bang the bejezus out of her. This is an activity young men partake in when they realize that young women are too difficult/pretty to pick up for recreational sex. The term "cougar" is ascribed to the older lady who, in her quiet desperation, drinks herself silly at the bar and acts like she never left sophomore year in college. Sadly, actual cougars are none too attractive, and usually ends up with you having to leave their house in the little hours of the morning, or suffer hearing about their "talented" and "gifted" their children are. But with regards to the term itself, let's just go back to "MILF"...even if they don't have kids. It just sounded better.

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